Sundays are for realising that he’s coming. That he’s inevitable. That, in a way, he’s already here. You feel him in the back of your mind. Grinding his teeth. Picking his nose. Raking his nails across the palms of his hands. He hungers, a snarling hunk of robo-man-flesh yearning for the time his clarion call rings out through the space between each of our psyches.

Something terrible and insidious this way comes. He glues a cookie-cutter short back and sides hairdo to his usually bald bonce. He cries out to the great corporate entities for money and wares to show off. He dusts off a tombstone engraved with the words ‘please wrap it up’. He howls at the moon. AWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Adrian Edmondson? “NO,” he yells, jumping on stage. “IT IS I, KEOFF GEIGHLEY.” You gasp in horror.

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Earlier this year, Mount & Blade II: Bannerlord‘s War Sails naval expansion had its release pushed back from June 17th to November 26th. You can give it a go right now if you fancy, so it obviously made that second date. Prior to the DLC dropping, I chatted with Bannerlord senior producer Falk Engel about what went into the decision to ditch the initial summer date, and why custom naval battles were only confirmed to be arriving with its launch quite late in the day.

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Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines 2 hasn’t sold as well as publishers Paradox predicted. As such, the company have announced plans to write-down 355 million Swedish Krona (approximately £28 million/$37 million) of the game’s development costs – essentially the financial way of saying something along the lines of ‘oops, this isn’t worth as much as we thought it was’.

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